Unexpected Loss

Our sweet baby Machen, whom we have raised since he was a kitten, passed away today. This was very unexpected and horrible. I mean, we knew something was wrong with him, but we didn't expect it to end this way.

He was a rambunctious kitten. He often drove us crazy. I knew it was just kitten stuff though. I assumed he would grow into a lazy, happy, comfortable adult cat. Now I'll never know.

I'm heartbroken about this. It's never easy to lose a pet. I loved him so much. Now all I have are memories and pictures.

Post Appointment

I had my first appointment to see how my implants were doing. We did another X-ray and a physical examination of them. The dentist said they looked great. 

I'm very relieved about that. The fact that these implants are under my skin and I can't see what's going on with them makes me so nervous. Until they're fully healed (which will take another 8 months or so), everything for me is just a waiting game.  It's frustrating but I just have to be patient about it.

Right now, there is a lot I need to be patient about. I still can't do everything I used to do before the surgery. Other things have to be taken slowly and gently.  

I'm doing my best. This whole implant situation was a major commitment for me and we all know how good I am at committing.

Father's Day

This is my second Father's Day without my dad. I handled it better than I did last year. I mostly just tried to stay quiet and distracted. That was for the best.

I still miss my dad a lot. I still feel very shocked by his death and part of me still wants to call him. I certainly won't delete his number from my phone. I may never do that.

It was also my brother's birthday. I wished him a good birthday and I hope he had one.

Recovery

I wish I had really thought through the timeline of this surgery recovery. I'm basically trying to deal with this while it's hot and muggy. That isn't making it easy. I feel drained and washed out most of the time. 

So far things look okay though. I won't have another appointment for another two weeks. I'm really hoping nothing goes wrong.

Surgery Today

My surgery was today and I think it went well. They did another scan of my mouth afterward and said everything looked okay. I didn't bleed a lot but boy am I in a lot of pain. 

The pain is pretty intense. I really want to rip my face off at the moment. It's awful. I really hope I can sleep tonight.