Accomplished

My side project is finished. It is just a little over 18,000 words. YAY!

It was so fun to do. It is very different than the way I usually write. I'm happy I finished it, not just on time, but ahead of time. YAY!

I feel so proud right now.

Annoying

I've been trying to work on some stuff all day and it's not quite working the way I want it to. It may be because I think I have a fever. It's not that hot, but I feel hot. I have cooling towels on me though and that's helping. Maybe sleep will help as well.

Our plans were altered because of an appointment being canceled.  It makes things easier in some ways, but changes in schedule are always really annoying. 

I have some stuff I need to work on tonight, even though I don't quite feel up to it. Hopefully I can manage.

Monday Off-Schedule

The therapy off-schedule went well. Though as always with therapy, I needed to nap afterward. I'm not sure if that's because I have to be ON and PRESENT or what. The nap helped though.

I wrote some this evening. I need to give my side project one more go over in editing, then I can submit it. Other side projects are going well. 

Got some Christmas shopping lined up and my new computer chair came in. So yay on all of that. 

Good Weekend

I wrote some. I edited some. I read quite a lot. I'm watching a weird movie about the events that happened before the events in Turn of the Screw. Marlon Brando is in it. He plays Quint and he's creepy. The children are creepy. Marvelous.

We have a lot of stuff planned for this week. I had to rework my therapy for tomorrow instead of Wednesday. There are appointments later in the week and my roommate's birthday. 

Looks like our reprieve from the heat last week has ended. It's going to be in the 90s most of this week. Hopefully, September's arrival will calm things down.

Sharing

I've had some situations this weekend with people, strangers really, telling me things about their lives that they shouldn't. In both cases, I wasn't sure how to respond. I wanted to lean in and help, to listen, but in one situation I was in a drive-thru line. On the other, it was someone else's Facebook post where I left a comment.

I thought about PMing the person on Facebook and talking, but I wasn't sure if that would be creepy. I don't know. I'm just not sure how to respond.

Hot End of the Month

Looks like we'll have some 90s over the next few days and then the weather will slip back toward the high 80s. Maybe it won't go back into the 90s during September. It was touch and go there for a while, but unless something dire happens (and it could), we'll probably, all four of us, make it through the summer.

Nothing about the neighborhood is exactly the same. We still drive by houses with massive tree debris or giant circles of dirt and tree roots. We still haven't completely restocked all of the food we lost. Given prices right now and the shortages, it's possible we won't restock for a while. 

Emotionally, everyone is still a little damaged. The panic never completely left us. When a storm like that hits, it's hard to feel secure. I think that's going to take a while.

Goodbye My Useful Friend

There is a utility chair in my laundry room. It's been in there for years. It was just this cheap office chair, but very very important for my wellbeing. It's the chair I sit on when I clean out the litter box. It's the chair I sit on when I put on or take off my shoes. It's the chair I sit on when I come into the house or before I go out of it.

All of those things are vital to my mobility. I need a place to rest after being outside. I need a place to sit when I do the other tasks. It's so important I have that. I wish it wasn't, but here we are.

Anyway, as I said, the chair is old. It was cheap. It broke in a way that I can't really fix and I can't use it anymore. 

I'm very sad. I loved this chair. It helped me live my life. It was a daily, very needed part of how I lived my life. Losing the chair makes my heart hurt. I'm just really sad right now.

Oh, and ashamed. I was fat-shamed so much as a kid that even though it's a reasonable assumption that anyone could have broken this chair after this many years of use, I still internalize it as my fatass fault. Now I get to spend hours trying to unravel that. So yeah.

A Good Night

Soon August will be over and things will begin to slide into Fall. I'm happy about this, even though we've already had to start turning on more lights in the living room to keep things balanced. 

The deadline for my side project is Friday after next. The story is edited (though I'll probably give it another once over before submission) and I've got the chapters outlined and named. It's in good shape. I beat a deadline.

Tinkerbell is sleeping on my desk and petting me with her tail. As it gets cooler, she'll probably move to my shoulder again. I love this kitty.

Writer Questions

Of the fanfic you’ve written, which is your favorite and why?

About Ten Minutes in the Afternoon of Our Discontent, a fic staring Caranthir, Haleth, and a hapless Mablung. It's my favorite because it's one of the first times I let myself write something lighthearted.

What’s your favorite fanfic trope? Have you written it?

Enemies to Friends to Lovers. I love every little path this trope can take. I love it when enemies take out threats to their enemies to keep them alive so they can keep being enemies. I love it when enemies are forced to work together and find mutual respect for one another. I love it when enemies go out of their way to ruin everything their enemy has just to watch them fall apart and despite this they still end up together.

I dance around it a lot in my writing.

Any fic ideas brewing that you’d care to share?

In the Damage Done AU, I have some scenes for Battle of the Lammoth that I've taken extensive notes on because it will be the first time we see the future Lords of Gondolin in action. And also because I guess I enjoy hurting Fingolfin.

Outside of the AU, I have a file called fangyFëanor.

Is there a pairing you would like to write, but haven’t tried yet.

Even though I have alluded to Angbang, I've yet to actually write it. That needs to happen at some point.

The Day Before

The new GRRM series starts tomorrow. Am I excited? Eh. Not really. I want to be, but eh. I hope it will be good. I still plan to watch it. We'll see. 

Writing is going well. I wrote quite a lot on the vampire thing and will spend part of tomorrow editing.

Warmer

We had to turn on the AC today for the first time in a while. It was nice to have some August days without the AC. After all the hot madness during July (except for those days when the power was off) needed some kind of balance.

My self-indulgent vampire AU is coming along nicely. I'm having a blast with it, honestly. I also wrote the band story. The servant one will be the last one, I think. Well, clearly as I'm already working on the other two. 

Productive Thursday

I started working on one of the Scribbles today. It's mostly finished. I'll do some more editing on the other side project tonight and then start on the second Scribble. 

I slept well. I slept until almost 11 and I very seriously needed it. I've been trying to be more brave and social lately. Not sure how well it's working, but I'm trying.

Writing Progress

I finished edits on the side project. I also posted my latest chapter on the AU. The side project still needs another going-over. It was written in pieces and I need to make sure the tone is consistent. I can do that over the weekend. 

After that, I think it will be ready.

Week Projects

Regarding writing, I need to finish a chapter on my main AU and then edit the side project. The side project is in a first finished draft. We'll get it to the next stage, hopefully, this week, possibly next week.

Some of the keys on my keyboard were sticking. I cleaned them out and...wow. Just...remember to clean out your keyboard, folks. Seriously.

The Price

Having to watch kids weeping because their religious families won't accept them for being gay or trans or nonbi or asexual or anything else that deviates from 'standard' will never get easier. It shouldn't get easier. It kills me to see this. These kids just want to be accepted for who they are. 

These are the same people who will scream that children are a gift. These are the same people who will scream about family first. 

I guess it doesn't count when it's your family or your children. I guess it doesn't count unless they follow your little narrow script.

I Should Point Out

I complain a lot during the summer and I know it's annoying. I'm not going to stop, but I am trying to make it a point to talk about the good stuff too. 

For instance, I have slept beautifully the last few nights. It's been comfortable and lovely. I wasn't hot or sweaty or unable to sleep due to the heat. Given that it is August, I really am thankful for some nights where sleep was decent and fully as long as it needed to be. That made some vast improvements in my overall general well-being.

Right now it's very nice. I have some cooling towels on me and three fans, but that, at least, is enough to keep me comfortable, despite the fact that my concentrator is on. 

And along with the good sleep and decent evenings (and mostly pleasant mornings), I've also had a lot of fun during Silvergifting Week. I put out a story every day and gained some new followers.  

School Starting

The school year is starting and like a worried old bitty, I think my nephew is taking on too much. I know at his age people feel like they can do that, but I know he stays tired. I don't want him burning out or messing up his AP or his tech school just because he felt like he HAD to work 20 hours a week too. 

I really do sound like an old lady when I write that out. Hah.

Things I Love

You know what I love? I love storerooms full of abandoned, but still usable furniture. I love the idea of decorating your home with things available to you by chance instead of it being things you pick out. 

No moral judgment against buying stuff at all. I just really love to see what people can do when they have to get creative with free pieces they never would have selected. Some of the coolest design comes out of that.

Been a Few Days

The blog has been neglected. I've been writing like a mad person. Three stories are finished and the rest are mostly finished ish. I know where they're going in any case.

School starts for my brother's kids tomorrow. This feels so very early for the start of school. And it's so nasty hot. I would have hated this. Especially band practice in the morning. Nightmare.

Anyway, several more days of Silvergifting. Tomorrow things get painful. 

Awful Cooldown

Sometimes during the summer, it will cool down, but it won't really help things. It will cool down enough to stress the AC so we have to turn it off. This will seem okay because the temp will be within a tolerable range. Except, it really won't be because the humidity will be insanely high and it will just feel horrible. 

It doesn't help that my stomach has been wrecked for hours now. The bathroom is the worst place in the house. It's a humid little hellhole. During the summer I try to avoid it as much as possible, yet my stomach keeps me there. Joy.

Busy Week

Okay.

So I have a friend and her child coming on Friday.

I also have my projects for Scribbles and Drabbles to get ready.

I also have Silvergifting Week, but that's fine. I've been working on that a bit anyway. I'm kind of theming it around Purple Rain because the album reminds me a lot of Celebrimbor and Annatar's relationship.

So yeah. Lots of stuff.

State of Me in August

It's hot but not as horribly hot as it has been. So long as I can keep my core temp down, I'm okay. If not, things go bad fairly fast. I put a microfiber pillowcase on the cushion for my ottoman. It doesn't completely help, but it helps a lot. Cooling towels help as well. I also have three fans on me.

The weather is supposed to go down at least a little over the next week. Being in the lower 90s during the day means lower 70s at night. It's possible we could be in the upper 60s on some nights and that would be amazing.

I continue to write and be sad. The usual.

Start of August

We paid some bills and ran some errands. It was really hot out there, but we lived. Hopefully, the electricity will function for the month. Published a story last night and I'm on the last legs of my collab project. 

I had therapy today and it went well. I'm a little exhausted though. I think I need a lot of sleep tonight.

Harsh

I've been really judgy lately and very harsh in my opinions. This has mostly been on my opinions of myself, but it always spills out to other people as well. I try to keep it from getting too bad, but sometimes it does. 

I think I'm going to try to stop being so judgemental this month. I need to just let things slide, not let them get weighed down with my opinions and assigned values. The world doesn't need more negativity.