At the Moment

I've been ill for a bit, shakey and queasy and uncomfortable. 

If I'm being honest, at the moment I really loathe food. I hate it. I hate the whole process of eating and gaining energy and storing fat and expelling things. I hate it so much. It's been nothing but an endless road of hell and discomfort for me. 

I wish I never had to eat again. I wish I could just survive off air or sunlight. I wish I could just be free of the whole process and never have to deal with a meal or its consequences again. 

Mind you, I have been sick for a few days. I know that's contributing to this. I know that now that I'm free from the constant gnawing sense of hunger that my whole relationship with food is changing. I'm sure it will settle on something positive and healthy. 

Right now though...

I'm guessing this is kind of like the stages of grief and I'm squarely in the Anger stage. Seriously, even though things can still taste good in the moment, I really truly hate food right now. I can't even think about it without sneering.