I had a former student tell me that I really helped to shape the direction of her life when I taught her. It felt good for all of three seconds, then my mind started flooding me with the countless other students that I taught. I could have been a light for them too, but I wasn't. My happiness and the pride I felt was gone, replaced with guilt, shame, and a sense of failure.
That, oh brothers and sisters, is the depression in action. I know this isn't true, but it's what the chemicals do to me. My body tries to sustain this hell and any positive chemicals I produce are basically seen as unwelcome. And no, it isn't always like this, but on the days when it is, it's nasty.
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