Day 22: A character you feel like you have to defend.
Even though I guess I should have expected this, I still feel very disheartened by the fact that I have to defend Daenerys Targaryen. I shouldn't be surprised, I suppose. People love to criticize and destroy female characters. Any woman who has power or, worse, seeks power, is almost instantly hated by others. It doesn't help when she is beautiful and young. If she makes a mistake, it is almost instantly demonized.
People write articles all the time about how much they hate Dany. People do memes about how much they hate Dany. People dismiss her accomplishments and powers. Almost any forum you go to will have tons of posts about Dany and how much they hate her. People want her to die, actively wish for her to die. People will defend Roose Bolton and Tywin Lannister. They will love on them for being ruthless and hardcore. But Dany? NOPE! She shouldn't be doing bad things.
To me, it's always most interesting how offended most of these people will be when you bring up the fact that she's female. They will deny that her gender has anything to do with it! They will state that females with power are fine. Just fine. They will get quite excited and defensive about the fact, because, of course, they're not sexist. Some of them are even women, so of course they can't be sexist.
I would venture to argue that sexism does play a part in the Dany hate. While people may not be outright womanhaters, many people do harbor certain biases when it comes to what they see as acceptable behavior by women. I find a lot of this in the 'anti-Dany' arguments.
"I liked Dany in the first book but then she got power and it went to her head."
Hmm. So. You liked Dany in the first book when she was a 13 year old girl who was being emotionally tortured by her brother and then raped by her husband. You found her personality to be acceptable because, of course, it IS socially acceptable for a woman to gain strength and defend herself against men who are abusing her. Women are supposed to do that. No MORE than that, but it's okay to defend yourself. Just don't let it go to your head.
"Dany was horrible when she was in charge of Mereen so now I hate her."
Yes. Dany is horrible at ruling Mereen. As I have mentioned before, Dance is a book about failure and Mereen is Dany's. I would like to point out three things here. 1. If Dany ruled well in Mereen, people would bitch that she is a Mary Sue. She had to fail so that she could grow as a character. 2. If Dany ruled well in Mereen, why would she bother leaving? She had to fail, so she could move forward. 3. Mereen is just too screwed up for anyone to change/rule well. It's really just the most illogical place.
"Dany just keeps getting distracted and won't go to the Seven Kingdoms so we can get on with the book so now I hate her."
Dany hasn't gone back to the Seven Kingdoms because GRRM couldn't let her yet. Now, he could have done other, more interesting things with her, but that's his fault, not hers.
"Dany just spends the last book having sex with Daario constantly."
You know, Dany is a teenager and likes boys. Daario is someone she finds attractive. He may not be someone YOU find attractive, but that doesn't mean you should hate her. People complain about his looks . . . the blue hair, the peacock personality, the gold tooth. Um, okay, have you ever seen most rock stars? They dye their hair and have grills and stuff? Yeah, some people clearly like this. Also, she doesn't have sex with him ALL THE TIME. I think their sexual encounters are mentioned like maybe three times. Stop making it bigger in your head.
"Dany has Plot Armor and nothing bad ever happens to her."
Dany was the product of marital rape. Her mother died giving birth to her. Her father was killed before she was born. She was exiled from her home and left in the care of a crazy older brother. She had to beg on the streets. She was often homeless, hungry, and lost. She has been given almost no education. She has very little connection to anyone. As mentioned above, she was sold into a marriage at 13. She has lost a baby. She lost the husband she came to care for. She has seen more starvation. People constantly try to take advantage of her, including those closest to her. How can you HONESTLY say nothing bad ever happens to her? What more do you want here?
"I wish people would stop thinking Dany is special. She's not special! She's NOT! She has no power and she's just some girl."
She woke up dragons from stone eggs. She is one of the main characters of this series. She will probably be one of the people who saves everyone from the White Walkers. Why does it scare you so much that she's special? Why is it so horrible that a woman is special?
"Dany isn't from Essos so she should stop trying to make decisions there/Dany isn't from Westeros so she should stop trying to think she can rule there."
Look. She was born in Westeros, so she is from there. She grew up in Essos, so she is also from there. She can technically rule both if she chooses and has the capacity to do so. Why does she have to prove herself so much more than anyone else when it comes to ruling? And I do have to ask that because I never see anyone questioning why Stannis has the right to rule or why anyone else would. But Dany? We have to question the hell out of Dany because of course she needs to prove herself just all the much more.
You know, I could go on and on with this. Griping about Dany seems to be a hobby for people. They truly dislike the poor girl and, quite frankly, I hope she wins and is the heroine and marries Jon and is queen and lives happily ever after. Just to piss them off. Yes, I'm spiteful like that.
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