Nightmares

I've been in a strange place lately. My sleep has been filled with nightmares. You know, I seriously miss nightmares about monsters. Those were easy. These are horrible.

One night I dreamed my grandparents were still alive and constantly accusing me of things I didn't do. No matter what I said, I couldn't convince them otherwise. The night after that, I dreamed I slipped and fell in a dirty public bathroom and had to walk around with other people's urine soaking my clothes.

Last night was the worst. I kept having post-trauma dreams about my hysterectomy. Because I was on pain meds at the time, the details of what happened to me tend to be blurry to me. My mind, for some awful reason, seems to have stored details I can't usually recall. Last night, it kept sending out memories of some of the more physically painful and terrifying moments. Thanks, brain.

Needless to say, I'm in a rather dark little place right now.