Monday, April 11, 2016

Message from the Marriage Market

I watched a very sad video today about Chinese women who are being criticized for staying single. The PSA tried to explain to their parents (and all of society, I would assume) that being single isn't a sad or lonely choice. It is what they want, and, honestly, in a society that offers very little legal protections to married women, it's also the most practical choice.

At one point, someone makes the comment that women aren't considered complete until they get married. Hah. If there were EVER a manipulative social construct, it's that. Married women die before single women. Yes, they claim to be happier, but why wouldn't they? Most of their options for happiness are limited after they've got other people latched on to them. They might as well make the best of it.

Some people might find this offensive and perhaps your situation is different, but I really don't think I've ever seen any situation where marriage completed a woman. That isn't a knock at men. Even in lesbian couples, I've never seen it completing them. Marriage seems to do the opposite. It creates this situation where you have to compromise your wants and needs to keep the peace. That isn't completion and the idea that it is selfish to live otherwise has been total manipulation to keep us playing along.

Some commenters wrote about how this means that China's vast male population will also stay single and how it will cause problems as the older generation ages and fewer people are able to fill job positions. So what? The women are under no obligation to compromise themselves just to save the country, especially not one that doesn't value them.

If everything falls apart, it isn't the fault of the women who opted out, it's the fault of those who didn't give them decent reasons not to.

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