I guess for about the last six weeks or so, I've been rather serious about getting my weight under control. If you've read the blog for a while now, you know this has happened time and time again, usually with meh results. I used to get really upset about that. These days, I'm okay with it. Even if this time doesn't work as I want it to, I'll still gain knowledge about what did work and what didn't. Said knowledge will inform me as to how to approach the issue past this point.
One of the things I'm really trying to keep track of is my hunger. Throughout most of my life, when I felt the slightest aspect of hunger, I would eat. The only thing that would keep me from eating was no access to food at the moment. When I did get access to food, best be sure I was eating then.
I'm trying not to do that now. I know another meal will happen eventually and if I'm hungry, I can just wait it out. It's not going to kill me, as we eat on a fairly regular basis. This logic does not stop my body from starting a cycle of panic when I get hungry. Yes, I just wrote that. Whenever I get hungry, my body starts to panic.
The inner drive for preservation is very significant in us. When functioning in a proper way, this drive pushes us towards making decisions that will prolong our lives. This is Maslow's base of the Hierarchy of Needs. Find shelter. Find safety. Find water. Find food. The drive to keep us alive communicates with our brain through a complex series of chemical reactions that urges us to respond.
When we respond in a way that the body knows will promote preservation, we are rewarded with happy chemicals. When we fail to comply, our bodies can and often do release panic-producing chemicals. Again, as a way to communicate to us what the body needs.
This chemical production is what makes the drive for preservation so potentially destructive. When this need is out of balance, it will often urge people towards preservation at the cost of everything else.
I know this to be true because I start to panic when I get hungry. I get nervous, my pulse races. The longer I go without food, the more intense the emotions. Just as soon as I eat, all of that tension melts away. My body rewards me with happy chemicals and tells me that this is how life should be.
The only problem is, humans really shouldn't eat just the very second they start to get hungry. It leads to people being in situations like mine. It leads to people who have to struggle to even walk into the kitchen to get their snack. It leads to people who prioritize food above everything else, even at the risk of their own life.
My way to combat this is twofold. First of all, I am trying to pay attention to all the instances when I feel hunger. Am I really hungry? If yes, fine. If no, then why am I feeling this? What is triggering the hunger? Once I pinpoint the triggers, I can begin to analyze why these situations push me into hunger. My guess is that it has very little to do with food at all.
The next thing I am doing is trying to rewrite my preservation drive. And yes, I completely believe you can do that. When I get hungry, I remind myself that I will eat a planned meal or snack after a while. I can wait and be perfectly fine. I'm also mentally promoting the preservative qualities of exercise. This makes me stronger. This lowers my blood pressure and increases circulation. These things help me to live longer, which is the POINT of preservation.
If anything, it's a new approach to the usual problem. It's a new mindset because clearly the ones I have had before didn't work for me. Will this mean I'll be a healthy weight five years from now? Who knows? I'll still be better off for the gain in knowledge.
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