And why is this?
Because they are one level of fucked up removed away from you. They helped to fuck up your parents and therefore contributed to the fuckinguppage that your parents did to you!
Oh wait, that's a bit sardonic. Maybe I should start over . . .
There are some really sucky things about being a grandparent. I think the fundamental sucktastic thing is the fact that you can have insanely deep emotional ties with people and have absolutely no control over what happens to them. Over the years, I've watched a lot of grandparents go through grief as their grandkids were put through bullshit by their parents. It must be horrible to watch your son or daughter make shitty decisions not only for their own lives, but for those of their kids as well.
Like me, a lot of kids end up being raised by grandparents. I lived with mine off and on over the years and then all the time after I got into high school. I won't say those years didn't have their bad points, but they were still far more stable and secure than the years with my mom. Damage was done, but less damage.
There are some really neat things about being a grandparent though. For instance, you don't necessarily have to have children to be a grandparent. My dad's live in girlfriend has been in our lives for years. They married a few months after my brother married, but they'd been a couple for over a decade by that point.
I like my step-mom, but I'm not close to her. Granted, I'm as close to her as I am to my dad, maybe even a little closer, but we never bonded. I have no animosity towards her and I'll be sad when she dies, but I don't call her on a regular basis or go to see her (or my dad).
She's like a distant friend. Someone you see at parties and talk to. Someone you know enough about to buy Christmas presents for. Very little beyond that. And that's nothing against her. She's a nice woman; she's just not my mom.
However, she IS my nephew and niece's grandmother. They have never known a time when she wasn't part of the family, so they just accept her as theirs. When my nephew was born and my brother and SIL were trying to figure out how to distinguish all of the many parents and grandparents and step-parents, my brother came up with a very interesting title for my step-mom.
Her name is Loretta, and so she became Nanalo. My brother thought this was so funny, because it rhymed with Manilow. My brother and I (and many others) have always have a running commentary about how boring Manilow's music is. Anyway, somehow the name stuck. My nephew refers to her as "my Nanilo."
And, it warms my heart how close they are to her. My nephew will slip onto her lap and whisper "Nanilo, you're my favorite." It's so cute . . . even if no one has told him he shouldn't pick favorites. I'm glad he and the niece have her to bond with. My mom died when my nephew was very young and even before my niece was born. Nanilo helps to fill her absence.
So yeah, to all the grandparents out there, all the ones who suffer wondering what is happening with their babies, all the ones who are reading stories for the billionth time, all the ones who are singing Jimmy Buffet as lullabies, and all the ones who never realized they'd get to be a grandparent, I'm happy you have your day. May you make a wonderful difference in people's lives, may they do the same for you.
However, she IS my nephew and niece's grandmother. They have never known a time when she wasn't part of the family, so they just accept her as theirs. When my nephew was born and my brother and SIL were trying to figure out how to distinguish all of the many parents and grandparents and step-parents, my brother came up with a very interesting title for my step-mom.
Her name is Loretta, and so she became Nanalo. My brother thought this was so funny, because it rhymed with Manilow. My brother and I (and many others) have always have a running commentary about how boring Manilow's music is. Anyway, somehow the name stuck. My nephew refers to her as "my Nanilo."
And, it warms my heart how close they are to her. My nephew will slip onto her lap and whisper "Nanilo, you're my favorite." It's so cute . . . even if no one has told him he shouldn't pick favorites. I'm glad he and the niece have her to bond with. My mom died when my nephew was very young and even before my niece was born. Nanilo helps to fill her absence.
So yeah, to all the grandparents out there, all the ones who suffer wondering what is happening with their babies, all the ones who are reading stories for the billionth time, all the ones who are singing Jimmy Buffet as lullabies, and all the ones who never realized they'd get to be a grandparent, I'm happy you have your day. May you make a wonderful difference in people's lives, may they do the same for you.
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