Monkeys and Endings

I have been having some amazing typos lately. I think the best one was tonight when I spelled out "monkey" for "money." Seriously, any time you can sub monkey for money, it's always going to be grand.

"I like him because he has a lot of monkey."

"I would stay at that job, but the monkey isn't worth my time."

"I hope they don't raise my rent. I really don't have the monkey for it."

"I would let him stay the night, but last time he did, he stole my monkey."

Okay, I'll stop now because I could keep doing these all night.

Nightmares plagued me last night.  This is kind of rare. Normally if I have shitty dreams, they're stress dreams. You know, the kind where you can't pay your bills or you've been accused of crimes or suddenly realize you've never been to Advanced Chem but you're enrolled in it and it's the final. Oh, and you're probably naked.

No, this was more your end of the world kind of dreams. Lots of lightening strikes around me and people trying to catch me to do . . . something. I'm still not sure what. No zombies though.

As I am in my more jaded mode, I would like to point out that I believe when the world is close to ending, we really won't see major global panic.  I think most people will be kind jazzed about the idea, about knowing there IS an end. I think you'll see a kind of happiness and peace of mind spread through everyone, a contentment in knowing the whole thing is just about over and there isn't fuck you can do about it.

That would really be beautiful. A whole world of people who understand there is nothing past a certain date, that everything will be over. "The End if Near?" Awesome. Cool. This idea of extreme panic and terror is pretty unrealistic.  There is no reason to panic when you know something is going to end, even if it's a scary something.

The time to panic is when you have no clue that there is an ending in sight.

They've actually done experiments about this. Scientist would take two groups of people and isolate them in rooms.  With one group, they would tell them to put their hands in ice cold water, but after three minutes, they could stop.  With the other group, they were told to put their hands in the water and given no time line for how long.

The people in the 3 minute group had no problem holding their hands in the water for that time. In fact, many of them said they could probably keep their hands in the water for a lot longer. The other group? Most of them panicked before the two minute mark.  When you have no idea how long something is going to last, your tolerance for it is far lower.

So anyway, yeah, end of the world doesn't scare me.  It means no more bills, no more pain. It means no more drama or listening to people talk endlessly about bullshit.  It means never having to worry about where your next meal is coming from or if you are going to run out of money.

And yes, I totally typed monkey again and had to backspace.

I love how twisty my brain can be.