There is this one episode of Squidbillies where Early gets hit on the head by a speaker and finds religion. At one point, Jesus comes down to talk to him and, rather politely, asks him to please stop speaking in his name. It's just doing more harm than good. The episode is funny, but it also has a ring of truth to it. Quite often, the biggest damage done in terms of communicating are done by people who think they are on our side, but are really just messing things up.
One of the most difficult things about communication is having to manage all of your representatives. We have to keep in mind that what we communicate isn't just about what we say ourselves, it is also what others say and do when they presume to speak for us. It's important that everyone who is on our side understands what we represent and what we are trying to accomplish, otherwise, we could end up spending more time doing damage control than anything else.
Using the Romney campaign as an example, we're starting to see a lot of places where things are unraveling. In this article and this one, people who think they are on Romney's side and championing his cause are actually doing things to hinder his ability to get elected.
The first article talks about how the soup kitchen where Paul Ryan pretended to wash dishes is now getting a barrage of backlash over admitting that Ryan did absolutely nothing while he was there. They're getting threatening phone calls and nasty comments on their Facebook page. Republicans who donated to them are pulling their funds.
Keep in mind, this is a non profit place that gives food to homeless people. They didn't ask or even authorize Ryan to be there. All they did was admit he did nothing WHILE he was there. But instead of Romney/Ryan supporters asking the VP candidate why he did this, they're choosing to bully this organization. They probably even think they are coming to his aid by doing this, making things better for him.
The truth is though, what they are communicating is that people who support Romney/Ryan are the kind of people who would bully a soup kitchen. They are the kind of people who would indulge a fake photo op and seek to destroy anyone who didn't go along with it. And . . . presenting that kind of image is NOT helping the Republican bid for the presidency.
The second article discusses something that is even more idiotic. The second debate between Obama and Romney took place in front of undecided voters who were allowed to ask questions. One of the women in the group, a 24 yr old teacher, asked what these men intended to do about the gender wage gap. Romney's answer sparked a million memes. His choice of words were unfortunate and when fact checked, proved to be false.
A conservative news source then took it upon themselves to begin to dig into this woman's Twitter account and attack her as a drunken slut. They did everything they could to make her out to be someone who wasn't to be trusted or liked. Let's keep in mind . . . all this woman did was ASK A QUESTION. She didn't attack Romney. She didn't call him a liar. She wasn't rude to him or his wife. She didn't murder his puppy. She ASKED A QUESTION. And for that, she's being raked over the coals.
This woman was also an undecided voter. She was someone who had not committed to Obama, who could have still been persuaded to vote for Romney. I won't presume to speak for her, but I think if I was trying to decide between two sides and one side's followers started attacking my character, I wouldn't be all that inclined to vote for that side.
In ANY situation where you are trying to communicate or influence others and you have a group of people who are helping you to do this, it is important that you have very strict rules for them. You are the brand, and everyone who represents you, who is speaking for you or as your supporter, is affecting your brand. It is imperative that you monitor how you are being presented, not just by you yourself, but by anyone who would speak in your name or about your cause.
Your message, your brand, and your goals should always be in the forefront. If mistakes happen, admit them and use them as places where you can show you are willing to learn and work harder, don't deny them and let people bully those who pointed them out. All that communicates is that you're trying to cover things up and surrounded by assholes. If someone asks you a question and you are trying to win them to your side, show them respect, listen to them, show empathy, and win their trust . . . do NOT let your followers bully them.
Of course, we can't stop all of the crazies or control everyone around us. There will always be a level of damage control that has to happen. However, if you make it clear from the beginning and continue to emphasize what will and what WILL NOT be tolerated, you will find you are seen as a stronger and more capable leader.
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