The THING

I'm going through A THING right now. It's a very serious THING that was unexpected, is confusing, and may potentially cause a lot of havoc in my future. I'm not ready to talk about it in the blog in an official sense, because I really don't know how the THING is going to resolve itself . . . if, indeed, it even can. I'm doing research on the THING and I've talked to some people in the know. Or, at least they are usually in the know. The THING is kind of uncharted territory even for them, so I'm not really getting any answers. I will tell you this. It's not a health issue. Don't worry that I'm going to die on you.

Well, okay, I say that it isn't a health issue, but in some ways, it really is becoming that. The THING is so scary to me that it's stressing me out and keeping me from getting anything resembling decent sleep. It's altering my eating patterns and causing me to have a lot of panic attacks. It is doing damage to my health, even though it isn't an official health issue in and of itself.

The reason I didn't blog last night was because this morning I went to meet with someone who I hoped could handle the paperwork portion of the THING. I was so nervous last night that I just sat here in front of the blog and couldn't write anything at all. When I went to the meeting today, I was shaking and couldn't speak without hearing my voice quiver. The worst part was, all I was told was that they couldn't help me with the THING and I would have to seek help in another place. All that stress for nothing.

I'm going to try and calm down about it. I need to be realistic and count my blessings. My roommate has been so super supportive and understanding. He's kept me calm when I would question if I was doing enough to resolve the situation and reminding me that things can only proceed as they will proceed. When something like this is happening, it helps to have a voice of reason.

When the THING is resolved, one way or the other, I'll talk about it on the blog. Until then, just understand that my crazier than usual posts have a reason behind them.