Pain

Last year after my hysterectomy, the side of my body was jarred, pulled far harder than it should have been, and it caused insane levels of pain down that side of my body. In all of my life, I had never experienced something so physically agonizing. It was so bad  that even with painkillers, I still felt so horrible that I wondered if I could even live.

After a while,  the pain healed. In the months that followed, I experienced more physical pain as a  result of the surgery though nothing as bad as those first few days. Eventually, that pain healed as well.

Recently I had a bout of sciatica issues and felt a lot of pain in my hip, rear, and lower back. I'd gone through sciatica before and knew it would subside after a while. It was painful, but as it was nowhere near as awful as those first few days out of the hospital. When I realized that, I just more or less hobbled through it, knowing I could endure far worse and that this would go away if I kept doing the stretches. Having this new perspective on pain is a great strength for me and, a year removed from the experience, I am grateful I went through it.

When it comes to pain and strength and various experiences, however, grateful is where I choose to remain. It is, as far as I am concerned, the least toxic response. My pain was my pain and my ability to heal from it is a remarkable and beautiful thing. I am blessed to have healed. It's something I will always keep in mind.

I think this is especially true because, on a daily basis, we deal with a lot of people who have not healed from their injuries. There are many people who have physical, emotional, and mental open wounds that, for whatever reason, just can't mend. The mending process is needed, but it isn't for someone on the outside to say when that should happen. Someone is still broke up over being raped? Why would you try and say they shouldn't be? Someone happens to still experience PTSD from their childhood? It is not your place to say when they can get better. Some wounds take a long time to heal. Some never do.

When wounds heal, they can give us great strength and perspective, but we should always remember this was hard won and be thankful for it. We should also be patient and gentle with those who are still healing. After all, one of the lessons learned from pain is to know what ache is like for others.