The Fall

I watched Saving Mr. Banks, a movie by Disney about Disney making another movie. Yes, things have gotten that meta. Part of the movie takes place when Walt Disney is trying to get PL Travers to sign over the rights to Mary Poppins. She is a prickly prim and proper snit to him and everyone else. She makes people cry. There  isn't a lot of emotional drama about the situation because clearly you KNOW she'll give him the rights. That part of the movie is okay, but it's really just the same cat and mouse (no pun intended) game over and over again.

The other part of the movie is flashbacks of the months leading to Travers's father's death. Her father, Travers Goff, was an amazing man in some ways. He was fun and creative. He paid lots of attention to his children. In every way that we imagine men acting during the early 1900s, stoic, proper, reserved, he was the opposite. Travers possessed a charming and poetic personality. He was romantic and positive and tried to make everything into an adventure.

He was also a sloppy alcoholic and probably mentally ill.

When we see him, he's in that place that many addicts reach, the place people usually don't like to talk about. He knew he wouldn't stop. He knew he had ruined basically every chance he had at making a decent life for himself and his family. He knew he needed to stop drinking, but had finally accepted the truth that he wouldn't. It was a dark truth, but very much the only truth. The idea that he would sober up and live a normal upstanding life was a delusion he and everyone else around him bought into. Then one day, he didn't believe it any more, and just accepted that he would fall.

Actually, in this case, he literally did fall. He fell off a stage and broke his leg. He already had TB, so it was just a matter of time before he died. And while I'm sure he hated the idea of dying and hated leaving his family, I think part of him knew it was for the best.

This isn't a popular opinion, but I think it would almost be easier on everyone if we'd give addicts a certain time limit on their addictions. "Okay, if you don't stop _____ in 25 years, then we're just going to leave you alone and let it kill you." The agreement would be that the addicted people didn't have children during that time, that way no one innocent would get burned with them. If you're an adult who chooses to be around an addict and buys into their promises of recovery and reform, that's your own fault. How many times are they NOT going to stop shooting smack or NOT actually losing weight or NOT ending their gambling before you just accept that this is who they are and move on if you don't like it?

Some personalities just can't function in a sober and non-self-destructive way. I don't know why that is. I wish I do. Travers Goff was an amazing person. A lot of addicts are. Maybe some people just aren't destined to live very long.