It's been several months now, but I still listen to the Hamilton soundtrack every day. I'm pretty sure I still discuss it with someone every day. I still sing some of it every day and I still have opinions about Arron Burr every day. In short, I find a great deal of joy in this, but the sad thing is that I know I'll eventually stop.
As I've mentioned before, I am a fickle obsessive. I get deeply into something, sometimes for a very long time . . . and then one day, I just can't anymore. I used to go to the ASoIaF boards EVERY DAY. I rarely go to them now. I'm not sure when I stopped. I just stopped. I used to love Naruto. Now it bores me to the point of feeling almost physically ill about it. When I was in college, my best friend and I used to watch Rattle and Hum ever single day. Then one day, we just didn't.
I'm just not good at commitment. At all. Whatever gene gives people dedication to things is missing in me. I can love something deep and hard, but not forever.
Admittedly, with some of the things I used to obsess about, I still have a lot of fondness for them. There are many authors I dearly love, even if I don't want to read their work anymore. There are bands I will say are my favorite of all time, even though I will skip their songs when they show up on my player's shuffle. It's a fondness, which is more than I feel for some things, I suppose. I just have no desire to make it an active part of my life.
And honestly, this may not explain why I'm single as well as some things do, but this aspect of my personality certainly makes me remaining single a good idea.
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