Le Sigh . . .

I'm quite sure this article will be talked about a lot.  The Right will sneer and say this is why Feminists are evil. The Left will say this is why traditional roles are still causing women problems. All of those people who hate anything and everything a woman says will find their own reasons for disliking it.

Basically, the article is written by a woman who spent two years in a very high level job that she had worked her whole career to get.  The problem was, she had two teenagers at home that she worried about all the time. Her husband was very supportive, but it still didn't stop her from being miserable. In the end, she quit the high level government job to go back to teaching college (and doing a bunch of other professional level things) so she could spend more time with her kids.

She says we need to stop telling women they can "have it all" because that just isn't possible. She discusses the myths surrounding it and breaks down the social factors that cause it.  She even offers some interesting solutions, such as women who want children finding other time to reach the higher levels of their careers.

I guess I never thought I had to "have it all." Of course, due to some physical issues, children were never an option for me anyway, so I dismissed that early on. I also knew I would never be trusting enough to deal with a husband, so that idea left pretty early as well.

For me though, I think she kind of misses what I believe to be the most valid and important point about what we should be teaching people when it comes to their life goals. We never seem to emphasize that people learn what makes them happy and focus on that. For some people, that will be a high powered and high pressure career. For other people, it will be family.  And for some people, it will be just enjoying time with their friends or in their own heads.

I always get frustrated when I hear about how women feel guilty when they can't balance an 80 hour work week with children, a husband, and social involvement. I always think, "Why the fuck would you even WANT to do that? When do you hear you own thoughts?" I know women who are busy all the time and never even finish  sentences. They will look at me and swear they are happy. Maybe they are, but I know I certainly would not be.

Of course, I always felt like this "totally committed parent" thing was kind of a rip off anyway.  I know most people don't see it that way, but if you think about it, it kind of is. You spend all this time and money on someone who is going to, at best, provide maybe an hour or two of amusement per day. And that's only until they leave . . . assuming they do.

And yes, I realize there are a lot of people out there who have no choice but to deal with huge workloads and still try to raise their kids. There are people who have absolutely no choice in the matter as to how much time they can spend at home.

To me, the simple and logical solution is just to not have kids. Yes, I realize that creates some problematic issues with how the human race would continue . . . but that really isn't my problem. We're not obligated to produce another generation. Not really. I get that a lot of people don't see it this way, though I have to admit I don't understand why they don't. Children add so much unnecessary complication to our lives. Just think of all the stuff you could be doing if they weren't around.