Gyno Update

I found the building okay and the office okay, even though I'm shocked I did. That medical clinic is so large, confusing, and complex that I was halfway expecting to find David Bowie with a big wig, tight pants, and goblins all around him. There was a lot of uphill walking, but I made it. If only marginally. I'm glad I got really insane levels of directions.

I had to wait in the office for quite a while. I know that is typical of doctors, but it wasn't helping my nerves any. It was bad. I was so nerved out my hands couldn't seem to hold the pen I was using to fill out the 80 forms they made me fill out. My leg was  twitching badly. I'm sure I looked like a mess.

When I was finally called in, I walked deeper into the bowels of the building. I'd considered leaving my walker with my roommate, but he suggested I take it along, just in case the walk was far past the doors. He was very right in this case. It's kind of seriously annoying how far I had to walk once I was back there.

The doctor herself was nice. I'm so grateful for that. I was terrified she'd be bitchy, but she wasn't. She was very direct with me and asked a lot of questions. Then she did a pap and a uterine biopsy. Both of these things hurt very badly. The biopsy was insanely painful. I just kind of laid there and told myself over and over again that it wouldn't last forever.

It didn't last forever, but the hell of it is, the exam made me start bleeding again. My cervix was very dilated in the process and she actually had to stick something in my uterus, which pissed my uterus off. Logically, this happens to everyone who goes through this exam. Everyone bleeds. Everyone usually stops bleeding after a while.

For me though, standing there with no pants on, watching in dismay as blood pooled on the floor between my legs, all I could think was how I should have just left well enough alone. The Depo was working fine. I'd stopped bleeding. Maybe that could have been the answer. But no, I had to keep pushing this, and now blood was dripping from my body again.

I go back in a month for an ultrasound and another meeting with her. I'm assuming we'll talk about the results from the stuff she did today. Ultrasound shouldn't make me bleed so maybe that appointment will be less stressful. As for now, I'm just hoping everything turns out okay.