So I'm sitting here about 30 minutes away from major storms hitting. I won't seek shelter. I never do. For one thing, refer to post on how much my cellar sucks. For another thing, I just have this compulsion to ride the storms out. I know it's dangerous. I know people die in these things. However, dying in a tornado doesn't upset me that much. And I in no way mean that as a casual statement against those who have lost loved ones in the storms. I don't want other people to die in the storms; I'm just okay about me dying in one.
Not that I want to die in a tornado tonight (or ever). I've just made peace with the idea if I do. Like being taken down by a serial killer or random shooting, there is honestly little I can do to stop it, so why worry?
I guess it's a Leaf in the Wind kind of thing with me. There is so much stuff the world is trying to make us worry about. How we look, how we smell, how successful we are, how much we weigh, okay, so everything, really. It sucks. We have to constantly fight against this crap. The worry keeps us from being happy. Hell, it keeps us from actually living in any kind of celebratory way.
So whatever happens, happens. I accept it. I'll survive it. Or I won't. Either way, I'm going to enjoy the next half hour and not panic.
I tried to cultivate this kind of attitude at the last minute. But I gotta say, once I heard the tornado roaring over Howe, and then the roaring getting closer, I was askeered. Just a little bit. ;)
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