Dear Critics of Feminism,
It seems that every day I hear you or read about you or watch you on TV spouting off your babble about us womenzfolk and our crazy want for being treated with dignity. In our society, it's somewhat of a sport to criticize and blame women for things, so I guess there isn't any reason for you not to take the easy road. In fact, most of the time, I can manage to ignore you.
Except . . . there are two points on which I cannot ignore you, because when you say them (which is damned often), it makes me stabby. Also, when you say them, no one ever seems to give you a reply. So, in the spirit of sharing, I'm going to reply to you now.
One of your most common criticisms is that things in our society have gone to hell since women "started working." By "everything in society," you tend to mean anything that you can somehow relate back to someone's childhood. Educational rates being lower, childhood obesity, crime rates, divorce, poverty . . . you get the idea. Anything.
Your thesis is that when women were in the home raising their children, cleaning rooms, preparing meals, and men were out working, things were better. In fact, you seem to have this Leave It to Beaver idea about how life was back then.
You see though, the problem with your idea is that, very simply, women have always worked. That's right. Women have always worked. Women cleaned other people's houses or had small businesses or harvested fields or worked as waitresses or any other number of things. It is only a very small percentage of very well off women who didn't work. Even then, these women had many duties outside the realm of children and household.
The rest of the women worked their asses off. They had to. Often, they did this work with babies on their backs or with small children playing nearby so they could watch them. They worked while pregnant. They worked after being raped. They worked as soon as they could after recovering from physical violence. Always.
Working for women isn't new. Working for a decent wage is and it still isn't as good as it should be. But working? That always happened. And you know what? People turned out okay.
However, and this is the big however, as much as the "society is fucked up because of Feminists" thing pisses me off, it is no where near as annoying as the other point I wish to address.
Yes, oh yes, the other argument you always make against Feminists goes something like this, "and women have had all this freedom for a while now and so what have they done with it? How have things become better?"
And now I shall tell you how things have become better. I was not forced and or subtly forced to find a husband. I lost my virginity when I saw fit. I have access to birth control. I can be paid (somewhat) decently for a job. When I speak, I am taken seriously. I own my car. I can own a house. I get to decide what happens with my money. I have my own bank accounts. I get to decide what goes on with my body. I am educated and can gain more education if I see fit. I can dress how I wish and buy what I wish.
That is how things have become better since Teh Feminism.
Oh. Wait, that was all about me, wasn't it? Did that miss the mark of your statement? Were you referring to how the society or the world or YOU have benefited from Feminism? OH hmm . . .
Wait. . .
That's right. I don't give a fuck.
You see, Feminism isn't about how women can now have other ways to make the world better. Oh, it can have that aspect, and usually does, but what is most important is how it benefits each individual, how it opens up things for people, singular people, to better their own lives.
You have this presumption, which stems, by the way, from your patriarchal pov, that if women are doing something or being part of something, it has no value unless it benefits The Group. You seem to think that it's somehow not enough that women can live their lives independently. You believe that they have to therefore achieve other things, that benefit society, that make you and your world better.
Really, what you are saying, is that unless women are somehow making things better for you, feminism has no real value. And that, dear critic, is the flaw in your thinking. We don't have to do a damned thing for you. Not one damned thing at all.
I hope that cleared this up for you.
Cheers and apple sauce!
BHB
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