I think most of my life, there has been conflict about toys for children. Some people hate gendered toys. Some people hate toys that promote violence or ones that promote traditional roles or ones that don't or all of the above depending on your stance in life. The point is, it's always adults (or groups of adults) getting all hot and bothered about the toys.
I get it. It's a triggered topic. It's really really easy to get emotional about it. Sometimes I even find myself falling into that trap. However, I stop as soon as I realize it because it's fundamentally pointless. And that really has to do with the nature of play.
Kids are going to play how they want to. You may give a little girl a billion baby dolls and she may play mommy with them.....or she may play CEO with them. It just depends on what she's interested in doing. My baby dolls always went on adventures.
By the same token, you may give another little girl a pile of rocks and if she's really into the nurturing stuff, she'll make them all babies. If she's really into fashion, she'll make focus on the designs or colors of the rocks. If she's into drama, they'll be the Real Rock Wives of the Yardville or something.
Toys are props. They're just the trappings children (and adults) use to fuel their imagination. The toy isn't as important as the pretending. As for what the kid is pretending, that's all very dependent on the child.
Toys serve another purpose as well. For kids who have rather frightening or chaotic childhoods, toys can be a very nice form of cheap and effective therapy. Anything soft and cuddly can serve as a protector, something to hug and hold onto in the night. Other kids will create their own order by organizing toys and placing them in rows and columns. They'll build structures that are secure and safe. They'll make forts.
My best therapy came from Barbies. When I was really stressed out, I would braid Barbie's hair. I would make the smallest and tightest braids I could. I would do as many as I could, always making sure they could divide by three because once I was finished with the braids, I would braid those together, and then braid those together, until finally I had one massive braid composed of many layers of braiding.
I wouldn't think about my life while I was doing this. No matter what horrible step-father shit was happening or crazy mama shit was happening . . . all of this was far from my mind as I braided and braided and braided. My mind shut down beyond just moving my fingers, feeling the sensation of moving the strange artificial hair back and forth, making sure each segment of the braid was even and perfect. Nothing else mattered. The world narrowed to just that action.
By the time I was finished, I was calm again. Maybe not for a long time, but at least until the craziness started up again. I was calm and Barbie's hair looked great. Life, in a small, minute way, had gained some level of order.
So next time you're watching one of these things where people are complaining about toys, before you get emotional or worried or up in arms, remember the nature of children. Remember the various needs of children. Stop trying to push your agendas on them and think about what their agenda is. Toys are important to children.
Sometimes, toys get children through childhood.
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