Welcome Sixth Follower . . . Who is Apparently Invisible

I was having internet trouble today and wasn't surprised when Blogger wouldn't load. Nothing else, has so why would it? Anyway, when I arrived at the Dashboard, I noticed I had a new follower. This is always a moment of joy for me because, you know, I have so few. Anyway, I click on the followers link to see who it is . . . and get some Chrome yadda yadda page about things screwing up.

I would love to say I did something smart at this point, but I didn't. I hit reload and then I hit reload again. Then, because clearly this was the path to success, I hit reload again. It's shocking how that didn't work the third time.  For some reason, my brain started working again and I flushed my DNS.

Wow, I kept typing "DNA." Can you imagine how cool it would be if we could flush our DNA? Just kind of select the stuff we like and then knock the rest of it out in favor of better coding?  This would be excellent.  But back to the story.

I come back to Blogger and click on my Followers. By now, I'm really invested in this because I've spent, you know, more than two minutes on it, so the excitement is building. Who could it be? Who could it be? And . . .

For some reason, it tells me I only have five followers. I'm a little confused at first. Five? It said six. I look them over, happy for the people I have. Hi, guys! Love you! And I realize that maybe it was a mistake. Someone probably followed me but then realized they didn't mean to and backed out of it just in the midst of the process of my DNS flush.  Oh well.

But when I went back to the Dashboard, there it was again. Six followers. Six . . . but the sixth person is invisible . . .

Huh.

Now I'm completely obsessed with this. I have a sixth follower, but someone I can not see.  Who could it be? Who could it be? I have some theories.

• The sixth follower does not wish for people to know they read my blog. I can understand this. It's kind of like how I don't like people to know I fucking love Justin Timberlake watch Gossip Girl and stuff like this.  If this is the case, then you have no idea how overjoyed I am at the thought of being someone's dirty little secret!

• The sixth follower blocks themselves from view for privacy reasons. If that's the case, I get it. The interwebs can be a scary place.  You don't want people knowing who you are and you don't want them stealing your stuff. Cool.
  
• The sixth follower is from the government. Yeah, this totally wouldn't surprise me. I'm sure the government has been listening in on my conversations for years.  It's fine.  I have no problem keeping them entertained.  They probably cry when they have to leave the Watching Blackhaired Barbie assignment. 

I'm sure there are other reasons as well as to why the sixth follower is invisible. Whatever the case, welcome. I'm glad you're following me. I cuss a lot. I hope that doesn't offend you. I also repeat myself. Often. Probably best just to skim the posts, that way whatever you actually pay attention to seems fresh and new.

Though, if you wish, it would be really fun for you to drop me an email or leave a comment telling me who you are . . . unless of course the government won't let you. I understand if they won't.  As for me, I'm going to go back to listening to "Sexy Back" watching the Borgias.