After my parents divorced, my mom used to cry every year on Christmas Eve when Dad would take us to his family's. I don't really know why. It isn't like she wouldn't be seeing us only a few hours later. It isn't like she adored us so much. I don't know. I guess I'll always be confused about that point. Then again, perhaps she just couldn't help it.
I think one of the reasons why the holidays always get to me is because I know there are people who are lonely and sad. It sucks that this happens. I've been fortunate in that I've always had people around me during the holidays. I know that if I live to be an old woman, that will more than likely change unless I con some young person into feeling sorry for me.
Anyway, I get why people feel tense during this time of year. There is so much expectation and obligation going on. It's stressful and it's tiring. Sometimes just the idea of showing up somewhere seems like more than you can handle. And yet, we keep on because to do so otherwise leads us down the path towards no one asking us or inviting us anymore. And eventually, we are alone.
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