I actually managed to do some responsible stuff today. I ran errands. I got my meds. I made sure my plans for the trip tomorrow were set. I made sure I had directions, phone numbers, and addresses. The gifts were wrapped. Okay, that's about it, but for me, that's pretty good.
My brother is taking me tomorrow and I'm happy about this because it's supposed to rain and his truck can probably handle that better than my van could. I won't say I'm looking forward to the trip, but I'm letting myself become a bit more accepting of it. It's closer to being over. That's awesome.
Part of the problem is that I'm scared they'll tell me I have more cancer. Now, this is an illogical fear, because, honestly, if they're going to tell me that I have more cancer, what better place to do it than the Cancer Center. You know, the place where they actually DEAL with cancer.
Anyway, I'm going to try my best to get some decent sleep tonight and try to be as capable to handle this trip as I can tomorrow. Hopefully I won't start crying or peeing at some point. It's always about leaking with me.
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