The Last Day

The last day of my 30s was nothing special. I drove my roommate to the store. I worked on some stuff for my SIL. I doubted my artistic talent. I entertained some people and I offered some advice. I hung out with the cats. I was annoyed by stuff on Facebook.

I'm happy to be out of my 30s. They sucked. I lost my job. I was desperate for money. I lost the three most significant women from my childhood. I lost two cats. I was humiliated on more than one occasion. I developed some really uncomfortable physical issues. I was sicker (twice) than I have ever been in my life. There were some very, very lows.

There were also a lot of highs! I gained some small financial security. I gained some wonderful new friends. I learned new skills, made peace with a lot of stuff, corrected some health issues, and settled a lot of stuff about who I really am. Oh, and I started this blog. I love this blog.

What do I want out of my 40s?

I would like to be more financially stable. I would like to be more healthy. I want to be at a more healthy weight, but I'd also really like to eat a lot of cookies. I would like to have less stress and less bullshit. I would like to be surrounded by calm.  I would like to find a way to make a living using my talent. I would like to be more vocal in what I need and want out of life. I want my time to be spent in valuable ways. I want to have long conversations, watch great movies, listen to amazing music.  I want to make beautiful things and make a lot of memories.

Mostly though, truthfully, I just don't want to be scared, hurt, and broken. I think I've met my quota for all of that.