Good News and Crazyhead

I've been meaning to mention that I've been given confirmation that I won't have to do radiation treatment. The specialist I spoke to informed me that she really didn't think it would do me much good. She thinks I'm best off just going with 3 month observation that will, in a year or so, move to six month observation. Eventually, I could move to that just being every year. This sounds better than radiation, even if it was just three or four treatments. I requested her conclusions be sent to my other doctors because I don't want to be the one to have to tell them. Better they know from her that she thought it wasn't needed than me looking like I just backed out.

How do I feel about this? Awesome! It means I'm not having to do treatments! It means I'm not having to face side effects because I seriously have enough of those already! It means I don't have more doctor bills and more situations where I have to get naked in front of people. Okay, I still have to get naked for the observations, but that is less of an issue.

Weirdly, and I do know this is weird, part of me also feels strangely rejected. I know that makes no rational sense, but I live in Hormonal Crazyland now, so very little of my reactions make a lot of sense. As much as I am overjoyed by the idea of not doing this treatment, part of me is thinking, "But it was such a nice place. I liked those people. And now I don't get to see them anymore." Yes, that makes a lot of sense. Sigh.

Anyway, I'm going to ignore the crazy thoughts and just focus on moving forward with my life. I need to set up a gyno appointment for around October, but I can do that when I see my regular doc next Friday. As you can tell, I'm in a better mood than I was yesterday. Well, I did think about crying earlier today for no reason. Menopause is SO much fun.